"There
are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a
miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
-Albert Einstein
Frequently, I get asked "what do you believe in? What is your religion?" and so I've decided that I am going to use this space to try and give people a sense of what I believe. First, I think that I'm a very spiritual person, and by this I mean that I see myself as very connected to the universe I am in. In fact, I believe that in a literal way, we are part of this universe, we are connected and we vibrate with the energy of life. To me, this is the most sacred thing: life.
Being spiritual means that it isn't about religion. It isn't about which book or which road you walk, but rather how you see things on the way. So, I was raised relatively atheist by parents who had formerly been active Christians (One Catholic, of course). This means little other than that I was raised in a culture and family where all of the blessings and trouble of Christianity haunted our morals and ethics.
I believe that a combination of frustration and the patriarchy, heteronormativity and other oppressive elements of Christianity have caused me to question religious dogma and always look elsewhere for essential truths from which I have built a system of prayer, morals, ethics and wisdom from that guide me. This journey began in feminist Neo-Pagan Witchcraft. Reading the works of Merlin Stone, Luisah Teish, Doreen Valiente, Adler, & Starhawk made me question religion and always ask, as Starhawk taught, "what does the spiritual system mean for me, for women, for children, for the oppressed?"
I learned from these authors and from Reverend Kelley Sprinkle at Syracuse University that spirituality, faith and belief in the divine (however conceived) should be empowering. It should connect us, elevate us and guide us to grow, change the world in ways that benefit the many and make us feel good at the end of the day. These lessons have taught me that spirituality is political, personal. lived and active. We aren't religious - we experience religion, we live our beliefs, we share them and enact them through our breath, thought, word and action.
I began to explore Witchcraft, Satanism (LeVayan not devil worship which is largely inverted Christianity) and the religions of indigenous peoples around the world. I took anthropology classes on world religions, cults, and even mainstream religious thought. I pursued ministry through the Universal Life Church and gobbled up any book I could that discussed how faith was experienced. Memoirs of the religious became my bedtime reading.
I found Lillee and John Allee, the leadership of the Allee Shadow Tradition. The Allees had me teach the nuts and bolts of witchcraft - Tarot Reading, Meditation, Neo-Pagan Ritual Practice. What I remember most was our late night discussions. I was blessed to live with the Allees and realize that it wasn't about the spells, the meditation or the divination - it was about the work. By the work, I mean the process of forming a community, of supporting each other through hardship. Using ritual as a way to come together as extended family and support each other. The magic was in our caring, our truth and our commitment to each other. Our service was our power.
When the Allee Shadow Tradition became affiliated with Our Lady and Lord of the Trinacrian Rose Church & Grove I began to work harder to learn the history, theology and practices of a wide range of alternative religious and spiritual paths and practices. On March 21, 2010, I received ordination with the blessing of our church elder Rev. Lori Bruno, a hereditary strega, renown psychic and loving Italian grandmother. This really opened me up. It has pushed me to follow my dreams in academia, to think big and always support the underdog. The Allees, Christian Day, Lori Bruno and others I have met through my trips to Salem, MA and my time with the Allees has taught me that part of spriituality is self-exploration. Finding my passion, my love, my talents and my fears, defining my boundaries and pushing harder to work thorugh all my own struggles has become an act of prayer to the universe. Living is my greatest way of showing thanks. Every smile is a spark of light that I hope ignites a wildfire of peace and love worldwide.
Since my ordination, I have realized that I've never followed one path. I always was interested in the work and not the theology. It was about my community, my service and my teaching. Never did I stop to question whether I believed in a number of gods. Asking these questions and trying to decide what religious tradition I was meant to be part of has led me on a journey for more than 5 years. Our Lady and Lord of Trinacrian Rose is my home but as a non-demoninational space, I had to leave on my own and find my niche.
Since then, I have realized that Ifa is truly the religious tradition that embodies my spirituality and institutionalizes it. Ifa, what some call Orisa Worship, traces its roots to West Africa and is the indigenous religion of the Yoruba people. Many know of the religion Santeria which is a form of Orisa Worship which adapted to western culture during and after the slave trade. Through my teachers - Oluwo Fagbamilia and Iyanifa Olufadeke - I have received Esu, and Icofa from Ola Olu, our grove or house in Florida. As I study the sacred Odu, the sacred texts of Ifa, I am constantly aware of the ways in which Ifa is a lived religion. Our truths include:
-This is a benevolent Universe
-There is a single creative force & no devil
-It is your birthright to be happy, successful and loved
-Character determines outcome
-Diversity is the hallmark of the Creative Force's creation
-Balance, growth and Wisdom are your goals.
These truths, taught to my by Oluwo Fagbamilia (Phillip Neimark) and Iyanifa Olufadeke (Vassa Neimark), demonstrate the ways in which Ifa is open to all people. The way in which we are guided towards introverted self-exploration, self-love and growth. Ifa has changed my life. I truly believe that the lessons it teaches are more necessary now, in our violent, divided society, than ever before. As my life continues to blossom from my study, relationships and work with the Orisa, and my ancestors, I realize that the journey to find my spiritual place has been much of the fuel that has propelled me in my professional and personal life.
So, in conclusion, my path wasn't a straight one. It zig-zagged, it had bumps, tears and moments of triumph. But I truly believe that my pastoral counseling, spiritual counseling through divination, study and teaching Witchcraft, New Age self-empowerment and meditation have helped me and others grow. As an Orisa Devotee, Reverend and student of the universe, I know that there are more struggles to come and I am ready.
I hope this long-winded recollection of my journey helps to dispel any confusion about my beliefs, religious practices and spiritiuality. If you are interested in any of the practices or traditions that are near to my heart, feel free to contact me. For spiritual counseling, divination, ritual intercession or assistance finding other such resources just drop me an e-mail.
Blessings on your journey!
Reverend John Crandall